Process
The process was quite helpful as we began looking at various different resources of stimuli to source off of for possible ideas to help with gaining a basic understanding of grasping and developing a concept into a full piece; although this was quite helpful it didn’t always help for the time I did one based on the cables and connections: (This was focusing towards the changes on earth and how the earth would always potentially win no matter the conditions).
I did find this quite interesting since it had many different approaches yet with such a minimal group, we couldn’t have expanded our ideas massively, as this was to avoid any form of complexity or overdoing it.
So we began to aiming it towards a simple start up which would be a chair in the middle to resemble for where the tv is sitting and then chairs opposite sides to it.
It was then that we’ve decided this could be used for a mirroring moment or what I’d class as absorbing mirrors and this is where one person sits opposite sides of the other behind and infront of the tv and as soon as one turns it on, they’d use the body to resemble lifeless whilst the other one inside: (otherside) of the tv becomes filled with life to show that the other person has lost consciousness of what’s happening around him and that the other person is showcasing his focus to being inside the tv.
The aim of this was to demonstrate how people are now easily losing touch with society through technology and devices of entertainment then living and exploring the outside natural life style.
11/12/19
- She’s left a letter to be read out – narration
- Mother is alone for a moment to have a mind like narrated or recording of her monologue with a lot of physical movement involved to express how she feels or what’s going on. – other people can play casual passers/people
- The guy reads in or has a recording that plays whilst the wife listens to his voice message over phone/letter
- A moment when the wife is standing there with loads of bystanders passing her over or people talking and she’s centre spotlighted with a recording playing or her doing a speech of how she feels or everyone is frozen.
- Makes it outside the school however the girl has a moment alone on the bench upset until the mother arrives to change the mood – Girl has a moment to think and talk to herself for a sad moment till the mum arrives. = Monologue.
- Rushing scene to get to her daughters performance however is blocked by consistent people just like how we did the shop scene with constant moving but slow tempo for her and fast for others to express how many people cut her off. –
https://freedrama.net/notperfect.html
(Original Version)
“THE NOT SO PERFECT CHILD”
JAMIE
(Quiet anger)
You hate me don’t you? I am never good enough for you.
(Anger builds)
No matter what I do it’s not as good as my sister. I always have to hear how she would have done it better. Or how she already did it better.
(Hurt)
Why does she want to ruin my life? She just wants to blot me out like I was some sort of mistake… I’m just a copy… A copy of a copy… Not as good as the original… Not as good as you.
(Sarcastic and bitter)
You are so perfect… Everyone around me is so perfect… And there was nothing left over for me… I am the leftover failures… I am the fatty waste you toss to the dogs.
(Fury)
Everyone hates me! Why does everyone think I am so horrible…
(Shakes and tries to hold back the fury)
Probably because I am. A horrible creature doomed to walk this earth and suffer… For you.
(Cries uncontrollably… Struggles to speak)
I’m hurting… Hurting so bad inside. Cut off from everyone … Punished for some past life wrongs… What did I do in a past life to deserve this…
Or am I paying for the sins of my father… And mother… Am I your sin? Or do I remind you of some sin you want to forget?
(Anger builds)
Or I am a disappointment that keeps disappointing. I even disappoint myself.
(Furious)
I will never be my sister. I don’t want to be her. I hate everything about her!
(Cries… Sadness)
But I don’t want to be me either. Sometimes I want to fade away… Become a shadow… Fading away… Forgotten… Maybe if you forget about me I won’t make you so sad anymore.
END OF MONOLOGUE
Rewritten Version
Girl
(Questionable)
You hate me don’t you? I am never good enough for you.
You’ve never paid enough attention to me. I am never good enough for you.
(Anger builds)
No matter what I do it’s never as good. I always have to hear how I could’ve done it better.
(Hurt)
Why does she never care about my life or what’s happening? It’s like I’ve never existed since the beginning… It’s just not fair, no where near fair. I can never have anything as great as she does.
(Sarcastic and bitter)
You are so perfect… Everyone around me is so perfect… And there was nothing left over for me… I am so forgotten and left…
(Fury)
No ones ever here for me! Why am I not loved by anyone?
(Shakes and tries to hold back the fury)
Is it because I’ve never done enough, or was it his fault?
(Cries uncontrollably… Struggles to speak)
I’m hurting… Hurting so badly inside. Cut off from everyone… What did I do to deserve this…
(Anger builds)
Im such a let down that keeps messing up.
(Angry)
I will never be that perfect girl or boy with her parents, I don’t want this to be what it is now.
(Cries… Sadness)
I don’t want her to be unhappy, sometimes she seems like she wants to fade away… be some a shadow… I don’t want her to be forgotten. I don’t want you to be sad anymore.
- She’s left a letter to be read out – narration
- Mother is alone for a moment to have a mind like narrated or recording of her monologue with a lot of physical movement involved to express how she feels or what’s going on. – other people can play casual passers/people
- The guy reads in or has a recording that plays whilst the wife listens to his voice message over phone/letter
- A moment when the wife is standing there with loads of bystanders passing her over or people talking and she’s centre spotlighted with a recording playing or her doing a speech of how she feels or everyone is frozen.
- Makes it outside the school however the girl has a moment alone on the bench upset until the mother arrives to change the mood – Girl has a moment to think and talk to herself for a sad moment till the mum arrives. = Monologue.
- Rushing scene to get to her daughters performance however is blocked by consistent people just like how we did the shop scene with constant moving but slow tempo for her and fast for others to express how many people cut her off. –
https://freedrama.net/notperfect.html
Original Version
“THE NOT SO PERFECT CHILD”
JAMIE
(Quiet anger)
You hate me don’t you? I am never good enough for you.
(Anger builds)
No matter what I do it’s not as good as my sister. I always have to hear how she would have done it better. Or how she already did it better.
(Hurt)
Why does she want to ruin my life? She just wants to blot me out like I was some sort of mistake… I’m just a copy… A copy of a copy… Not as good as the original… Not as good as you.
(Sarcastic and bitter)
You are so perfect… Everyone around me is so perfect… And there was nothing left over for me… I am the leftover failures… I am the fatty waste you toss to the dogs.
(Fury)
Everyone hates me! Why does everyone think I am so horrible…
(Shakes and tries to hold back the fury)
Probably because I am. A horrible creature doomed to walk this earth and suffer… For you.
(Cries uncontrollably… Struggles to speak)
I’m hurting… Hurting so bad inside. Cut off from everyone … Punished for some past life wrongs… What did I do in a past life to deserve this…
Or am I paying for the sins of my father… And mother… Am I your sin? Or do I remind you of some sin you want to forget?
(Anger builds)
Or I am a disappointment that keeps disappointing. I even disappoint myself.
(Furious)
I will never be my sister. I don’t want to be her. I hate everything about her!
(Cries… Sadness)
But I don’t want to be me either. Sometimes I want to fade away… Become a shadow… Fading away… Forgotten… Maybe if you forget about me I won’t make you so sad anymore.
END OF MONOLOGUE
(Rewritten Version)
Girl
(Questionable)
You hate me don’t you? I am never good enough for you.
You’ve never paid enough attention to me. I am never good enough for you.
(Anger builds)
No matter what I do it’s never as good. I always have to hear how I could’ve done it better.
(Hurt)
Why does she never care about my life or what’s happening? It’s like I’ve never existed since the beginning… It’s just not fair, no where near fair. I can never have anything as great as she does.
(Sarcastic and bitter)
You are so perfect… Everyone around me is so perfect… And there was nothing left over for me… I am so forgotten and left…
(Fury)
No ones ever here for me! Why am I not loved by anyone?
(Shakes and tries to hold back the fury)
Is it because I’ve never done enough, or was it his fault?
(Cries uncontrollably… Struggles to speak)
I’m hurting… Hurting so badly inside. Cut off from everyone… What did I do to deserve this…
(Anger builds)
Im such a let down that keeps messing up.
(Angry)
I will never be that perfect girl or boy with her parents, I don’t want this to be what it is now.
(Cries… Sadness)
I don’t want her to be unhappy, sometimes she seems like she wants to fade away… be some a shadow… I don’t want her to be forgotten. I don’t want you to be sad anymore.
END OF MONOLOGUE
I don’t want her to be unhappy, sometimes she seems like she wants to fade away… be some a shadow… I don’t want her to be forgotten. I don’t want you to be sad anymore.
END OF MONOLOGUE
01/01/20
In this session, I was aiming to work towards improving my bodily movement as well emphasizing my actions more clearly: this is mainly for the moment when I’m angry at who my character is speaking to whilst they’re working a normal job on the computer. It’s due to them taking far too long and that my character doesn’t have enough time to sit around and so I had to work on walking around her whilst clearly expressing and conveying the anger from my character during that moment.
In the beginning I wasn’t making it around lily quick enough due to getting up at the wrong time or even doing actions for unnecessary lengths of time: I’m hoping to improve on this by rehearsing within our next session for timing of what moment it starts.
01/08/20
During this session we began rehearsing, however I was focusing more clearly on the moment for when I dance in the beginning: as I would end up letting my arm go limp instead of keeping it straight whilst not looking back and fourth therefore avoiding the connection between my character and the other.
This wasn’t good since both of the characters are the one’s who end up getting married and this could’ve caused an issue through not demonstrating the relationship between one another.
I’m hoping to improve on the dancing by watching and learning from basic dancing guides on how to correctly engage during a ball dance or any form of celebration.
I used the tutorial below to get a basic understanding of dancing effectively for which then I started to experiment with the body to create something slightly different.
01/15/20
In this session we began to explore and timescale how long each scene would take up: as we also used the usual room to go over transitioning as well actions during the scene by polishing up the movement and timing with the timing of the song.
I had to also work on improving on the timing with my movement with the umbrella. I was needed to turn away then blindly in synchronicity move back with the song: this would lead me to be covering Lily from the rain during the scene; although I keep end up turning either too late or too quickly, this wasn’t a massive probably yet the hesitation that I kept showing was an issue.
I planned on improving it by taking a moment with Amy by asking and practicing our timing for what note change we turn on.
01/22/20
Today was our final rehearsal session as well as the tech run, this was quite helpful for the matter that it helped with identifying any problems within the performance including the moments that required sound or song changes: this was important to have the scene transitions more clearly.
I found it quite difficult for understanding the scene transition near the end regarding the Christmas family table setup as it wasn’t properly rehearsed at all until the performance day for which caused it to be quite messy without any understanding of time or actions: this made it seem quite unorganized.
It was then with such short period of time that we had: we decided to change it around with placements and who and how we move the props and objects onto stage to encourage the use of time whilst the monologue is going on.
In future, I’d like to have a much more engaging participation with future projects as I’ve mainly written a stand alone monologue with various scene idea’s.
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